How to be a craft brewer who doesn’t give a flip:

Evil Twin might make it look easy, but becoming a craft brewery with more fanatical fans than Michael Jackson isn’t actually that easy. You’ve gotta’ tease your fans, make them suffer a bit, and then give them little tastes of really good beer… again and again. Here’s a guide to becoming a notorious brewmaster, using Evil Twin’s head brewer Jeppe as an example.

#1: Brew beer with so many delicious real dessert ingredients, fans can’t help but feel nostalgic, hungry, confused, and excited just knowing it exists. Then, keep adding more yummy things to it. A lot more. Example: Maple Bourbon Barrel-Aged Imperial Mexican Biscotti Toasted Coconut Cake Break Stout, Jeppe’s most recent gift to the craft world. What was once Imperial Biscotti Break turned into a Mexican Imperial Biscotti, and now he’s just layering flavor upon luscious flavor.

#2: Make beers with really expensive ingredients in really small batches so you can charge a lot of money for them. Because having to save for something makes you want it more. Example: When one fan posted the amount they paid for Maple Bourbon Barrel-Aged Imperial Mexican Biscotti Toasted Coconut Cake Break on Instagram, someone offered him three times that value, plus shipping costs, IMMEDIATELY.

#3: Make friends with everyone. Then call yourself a “gypsy brewer” and make “your friends” do all the hard work. Example: Maple Bourbon Barrel-Aged Imperial Mexican Biscotti Toasted Coconut Cake Break is a collab with Westbrook Brewing, where Jeppe snapped an IG photo of himself sleeping in a hammock next to a mash tun.

#4: Promise fans that you’ll build a brewery, but don’t. Then, while it’s “under construction,” distract ‘em with another bodacious beer. Happy fans? Check. Low overhead? Double check. Example: Maple Bourbon Barrel-Aged Imperial Mexican Biscotti Toasted Coconut Cake Break is Jeppe’s newest scheme to keep Evil Twin fans wishing for a taproom and not caring if it actually comes. He posted photos of this beer at the same time he posted Facebook selfies standing amidst rubble on a NYC warehouse floor. Guess what made people more excited?

#5: Make your beer super boozy. Because by the time your fans actually get to try it, they’re gonna wanna get lit. Example: Maple Bourbon Barrel-Aged Imperial Mexican Biscotti Toasted Coconut Cake Break is 10.5% ABV. #thanksalot

#6: Be Jeppe, Evil Twin’s head brewer/owner/anti-hero/rebellious punk/genius. He quotes himself on his own website. He plasters social media with photos of himself. He IS Evil Twin, the only brewer who would even try to craft a Maple Bourbon Barrel-Aged Imperial Mexican Biscotti Toasted Coconut Cake Break Stout. And then make it so tongue-waggingly good.

So, go break the piggy bank: you know you wanna try a decadent dessert beer from THE brewer who doesn’t give a flip.

Rated 4.34 on Untappd

Packaged On June 27th, 2018